Swipe right



 

 

HERE IS a reprint of Robbie Hamby’s award winning column “Swipe Right”. She has placed first with her musings in three Better Newspaper Contests in 2016.

People often ask me if I am going to write about being single. If

I plan on writing about some of my experiences with online dating.

My usual answer is, “No way, Jose!” I couldn’t imagine doing that, putting that much personal stuff out there for the world to see!

Anyone who reads my column can tell I have a bit of selfdeprecating humor. But in general I wouldn’t want to hurt someone else’s feelings by telling tales out of school…

Yet, here I am telling the world, or at least a few Atascosa Countians a little bit about what it’s like to be a single 40-year-old woman in 2015.

I’m sure everyone is aware that I was married for 20 years…that’s a long time. Being single is a new world for me and I spent a good year and a half healing from my divorce. I just recently got out there and became serious about this dating game.

The truth is, up until about two months ago I was convinced I didn’t want a relationship.

I wanted to be alone.

I didn’t want to answer to anyone. I wanted to have my own life, do things my way.

I was pretty content with that prospect.

So starting off I was mostly going out because of peer pressure.

When all of your newly single friends are dating left and right you start to wonder, what’s wrong with me? Why am I still single? Why don’t I want to actually date?

And then one day the unthinkable happens. You wake up and it hits you… you don’t want to spend your life alone.

Terrifying.

Now, at this point I had already signed up for a few dating sites, but decided it was time for me to take things a bit more seriously!

That said, you have to take it as lightheartedly as you can.

I’ve had some pretty funny moments, some shocking moments and a few moments that have actually made me quite sad.

I would love to share with you a couple of those funny moments!

Of course, I can’t name names..but I must mention one young fellow that I met.

Handsome as he was, it was obviously not a love connection.

I should have been clued in when he mentioned he had an unfulfilled fantasy… to go LARPing.

Now if you don’t know what that is, please mark your spot and take a moment to go look it up.

Done?

Yeah…LARPing.

If that didn’t clue me in, the phone call to verify our meeting place should have.

He sounded like a 14-yearold girl. Okay, I’ll be kind. A 12-year-old boy.

Sigh.

Then there was the fellow I met who enjoyed his meal so much that he licked his fingers.

Every.

Single.

Finger.

Twice.

And when I say fingers, in this case, I am including the thumb.

Maybe I should have been flattered that he felt that comfortable with me. But, um, I really wasn’t.

The world of online dating is interesting to say the least.

Let me explain the process on my favorite site. A photo comes up with a name, age and bio (if the person has chosen to put one up). You can look at a few of their photos. You “swipe left” if you aren’t interested, never to see that person again! You “swipe right” if you are.

If they swipe right, you are matched! You can then message each other.

Easy breezy!

You see people you know in real life, and sometimes you swipe right because you are actually friends and it’s just funny.

Maybe you see an old high school crush and you can’t help but get a little giddy when you “match.”

And sometimes you quickly swipe left…Like if you happen to see your ex.

You see people on there you shouldn’t be seeing. Guys who are married or in a relationship.

Sad.

You have your flirtations… and it can be pretty fun. Flattering. But sometimes the games get old. You feel toyed with.

It’s like high school on steroids.

You also judge people based on their looks.

At first that made me feel bad. But aren’t we all doing that anyway?

Sigh.

It is what it is.

It’s meeting new people and making new friends. Maybe more, maybe not. It’s about making an effort to live your life.

So, my car is getting a lot more miles and my liver is filtering a lot more margaritas… all in all, I’m trying to enjoy this crazy ride.

So, that said, I guess I’ll “Keep Playing.”


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