Advice for adulting

The Way I See It



The other day I read a blog by Cindy Farr at Her list of 10 things her adult children should know should be read by every parent – even if their children aren’t adults quite yet.

I agree with every one of them. Her first one was to be kind. This takes me back to my favorite quote by Henry James: “Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind.”

Another one is to not settle. She recognizes that millennials don’t participate in things that don’t make them happy. Don’t like your job or where you live? Leave/move “you are not a tree” she says.

I laughed out loud when one of them was “make your bed” then she added “Nah, I’m kidding!” I’m a firm believer in making beds (my column two weeks ago) but I get it. She does advocate for changing the sheets or at least the pillowcases weekly.

Her rule number 7 follows:

“ My simple rule of “the more you. . .”. You know, the more vegetables you eat, the more vegetables you will eat. It’s all about good habits. The more you practice your good habits, the more they become your good habits. (Unfortunately this can apply to bad habits too so watch yourself. . . repeating a bad habit can make it seem okay).” This one is SPOT ON. I wish I had known this rule when I was a fledgling adult. Maybe it can still be mantra for me at this stage in my life, too.

Here is a brief list of the rest: Overdress. Save some money. Don’t fill out recipient’s email until you’re ready to send. Mindfulness. Love your siblings. Know that your parents love you with their entire hearts and souls. She threw in one more because she could … to pay off credit cards each week. This may be the toughest one to do, but what great advice.

I would add these two (for now):

Share your thoughts with your loved ones. We really want to know what is going on in your life. Every now and then we want to be able to offer advice when you ask.

Give back. This could be volunteering or supporting a cause that is near to you either by donating time or money. Doing something that makes someone else’s life better will

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I life better. see it, I wish that a few of these bits of wisdom would have been shared with me when I was younger. At least I did have role models that led by example and not by written rules.

SUE BROWN is a columnist of the Pleasanton Express. Contact her at

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